Wait! What I really Meant To say was…

Have you ever walked into a room and felt your entire soul sink? You quickly realize why: this person (we won’t even define the relationship) is standing over there with other people, less honest and real people, and your wind is immediately knocked out of your sails. There is so much unsaid, so many things you would NEVER say out loud. Then the polite conversation ensues – “hey… it’s been too long. how are you (thud, heart hit the deck!)” and the reply is always the same “f-i-n-e”. (It is common knowledge now that fine really means F.reaked out I.nsecure N.eurotic and E.motional, right?) Regardless… everytime this happens to me, with only a few people, this song begins to play in my head on loop-cycle. It is a spectacularly raw song that I have loved since it’s inception. Props to Cyndi Thomspon and Tommy Lee James (co-writer) for the reality and vulnerability they put together in this gorgeous story. Enjoy.

This song will forever be my ‘too little, too late’ song.

_______

And as you walked away
The echo of my words
Cut just like a knife
Cut so deep it hurt
I held back the tears
Held on to my pride and watched you go
I wonder if you’ll ever know … what I really meant to say

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