Fossilized

I. Am. Paralyzed.

No, not in the physical sense… although sometimes it seems that way. But, do you know that  feeling when you are overwhelmed on so many different accounts that you, rather than jump into action, become frozen. Stagnant. Glued in place. There I am. A bug frozen in amber.

Frozen in an uncomfortable form, making no progress forward nor backward, and all I can hear are my thoughts saying “stay, stay, stay”

I have many decisions coming up. To stay or to leave, to apply or to wait, to study or to pull it out of the top hat of tricks I have, graduate school now or later?

I think my problem is in the possibility. I am seeking my Ph.D. WHAT? What am I thinking?

(repeat until self-fulfilled: I can do it, I can do it, I can do it)

I can do it. But the ‘can’ is not as much of an issue as the getting started. I guess it’s simple despite my stomach’s rumble saying it is tumultuous.  One step begins every journey. Here’s to comfy walking shoes and a long path ahead…

_______

“You will never reach your goal until you start to take action, any action.” Byron Pulsifer

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